Wow. I didn’t realize it, but it has been almost a month since the last time I opened up this here posting box. A month! Crap. Check it… I have a tendency to get caught up in my own head and when that space gets dark, I feel it is better to take a step back and sort out my feelings before I go opening that door out on to the world. I’m not one of those people who sits around and openly complains about stuff. There is far too much of that on the internet and I try my best to not be one of them.
You got some time? Cause you’re going to need it for this long ass post.
I will start by getting the filthy parts out of the way. And no, not that kind of filth, yo. You wish.
Just like a couple of years ago, I have spent most of the past four months sick. Way too many pills, mucus, sinus and ear infection bullshit, lung bullshit, asshat doctors who weren’t fixing me and shit just kept coming back.
It is emotionally debilitating to spend that much time in a place where your body is giving you the big ole fuck you. Paired with Winter, that is thankfully on its way out, and all of the personal things that transpired in February, I was a heaping, emotional mess. I think I could go as far as saying I was slipping into depression land. Not a great place to be dude.
I finally had an “enough is enough” moment and went back to my dr a week ago and said, “dude, I want to know why this keeps happening, why am I hacking up rainbows of slime, the last guy I saw was a quack and I am doing everything in my means possible with my diet + holistic approach, I want to get better, ENOUGH.” – A breathing test, a chest x-ray, a diagnosis for asthmatic bronchitis, several prescriptions and we are back to business. Within days I started feeling better, sleeping, taking less OTC garbage… OMG dude, you have no idea how awesome it feels like I am heading back to being myself once more.
On top of being sick, I am just utterly home sick. I miss my friends, my family. Fuck this place with a splintered broomstick, for reals. Josh and I are just done with NJ. We will make the best of it till the door out West opens back up. Things are moving, I’m just a tap impatient and wish it would move faster. More on that later if and when there is something to disclose.
Other than that I am dealing with:
still processing my brother dying
the rehashing and reminders of the loss of Nena
the fact that being laid up on/off so much for four months has me feeling like a swollen version of who I am
the fact I am disappointed in a few people. You know, when you give people more importance than they give you? Yeah. It’s bummer town.
Josh decided to start testing the waters on vegetarianism and in turn, I have followed suit. It’s supportive and makes cooking easier. It’s not a permanent lifestyle change by any means but testing the waters is making the both of us figure stuff out. It’s kinda cool but I won’t lie, when you grow up in such a meat-centric culture, it can be a little daunting. I have felt a lot better and I don’t know if it’s psychosomatic or what but I am definitely going to abide by more dietary changes this Spring/Summer.
Not all was lost being sick and holed up in the house. It seems that the one thing that didn’t suffer, in fact picked up with force was my art. I have been drawing/painting/creating on an almost daily basis. If you follow me on instagram or facebook you have probably seen a great deal of it.
This is my problem with my creative stream… I do a lot of different things and because I like so many different looks and mediums I find myself dabbling instead of honing my personal style.
Last week I had a total epiphany. I posted a couple pieces that I was super proud of, they poured out of me totally organically and it hits me. This is it Ivonne, this is *YOUR* style. Ironically if you saw some of the stuff I drew when I was much younger, it looks like an evolved style of those drawings. Case in point…
I drew this when I was like, 20? 21?
This is the recent stuff…
I see the similarities and I just think maybe I need to continue to explore this avenue while still keeping the toes in the other puddles to stay challenged. I really like this direction.
Now I just need to get some $$ together to get a decent printer to run my own prints cause a lot of people are asking. And before you suggest kickstarter, it’s not my m.o. – It makes me feel like an e-panhandler.
I have some commission work in the pipe and I am going to get to it lickety split.
Girl turned another corner and thankfully for the better. She has been in a funk as much as I have, partially attributed to the fact she had a sinus infection for a month. She got treated and it came back with full force. So a month of snot and hacking up for her too. She is doing a lot better now.
She has been busting ass in karate and recently was upgraded to orange belt. She was super stoked. I am just bummed cause if and when we move she may have to start over or lose her rank. But dude this face… look at it.
We recently went bowling for the first time and she absolutely loved it. Girl is pretty decent with the bumpers up 😉
She finally got to make her first real snow man. We got a freak of nature snow day that kept Josh home. It wasn’t the best now but Josh, Tom and her got in a slushy snowball fight. Plus, it was now or never! her first snowman was born. She christened him “Snowdirt”
Her current favorite songs are:
Pure Imagination and I Want It Now from the original Willy Wonka soundtrack
Big In Japan – Alphaville
She pretty much reads on her own now, blows through her flash cards, is getting infinitely better at the first grade level math books I have been working with her on. Girl is so flipping smart it blows me away.
Oh yeah and she is a hairline under 4′ and about 55 lbs. Dude.
And here is a bunch of Jumbalaya I want to share…
Stryper has a new album where they re-recorded their old whatnot and I have to say this dude still sounds really fucking good. Well played, even if you’re God Squad, I forgive you.
We finally took the plunge and cancelled our cable and do not regret it one bit. Time is scarce to get sucked into that shit, more when I have tons of far more productive business to tend to.
Filter has a new album coming and the single is awesome. Here’s to hoping the rest of it is just as promising.
I made this crockpot chicken enchilada soup and it was really good.
If you are a coffee connoisseur, I came across PT’S Coffee and their beans are ON POINT. A little on the pricer side but absolutely worth shelling out for a small bag. The Villa Loyola is tasty freeze.
Josh finally got to fulfill his lifelong dream of seeing the Air & Space Museum at the Smithsonian Complex in DC. Nerdery ensued. It was so cool watching him be that stoked on something. In fact we all shlepped down to DC for the day, did some museum, walking, met up with Diana and ended the day with some amazing Burmese food. If you’ve never had it, GO.
Are you paying attention? Let’s see how much you are. As you know, every once in a while I do giveaways on my blog and like past occasions, I am giving away another conjoined gingerbread man cookie cutter (like this one). All you need to do is comment saying you want it and I will enter you in a drawing. That is it… and only to this post, not on fb, livejournal or otherwise.
I spent the past couple of days writing notes, making cards, postcards. I am all about reaching out and touching someone. I like being honest, telling people I know and love how awesome they are. In the past 2 days there were 16 cards and a postcard… you lucky recipients will know who you are when they arrive. I hope I get some responses, my mailbox could use more than pizza joint menus and bills.
My oldest sister got attacked by a german shepherd the other day. The owner said his dogs were cool and they were walking around them and then all of a sudden the fucker clamped down on her knee. 25 stitches later. Fucking sucks… sadly this happened in Mexico so there are like zero legal repercussions. She is ok but a little upset for obvious reasons. Hey universe? Throw Liz a big bone yeah? She could use some happy pie.
And no, I am not being paid for any of the linkage. I should be! But hey, I still share the love where it is due. Si!
“A Different Arrangement” by Black Marble. It’s really fricken good, kind of a synth-like Joy Division. Hard to explain but really damn awesome.
Also the self title by Jatun.
This track that Spencer made under ZYXT – Josh on vocals.
Spring is here and even though the air still bites, the color is returning to this dreary world, in more ways than one. If I have been distant, crabby, uncommunicative, I am gonna pull a total dude breaking up with his chick… “It’s not you, it’s me”. Trust me, if it was you I would fucking tell you.
Thanks for waiting around for me, it means the world.
Oh and Spencer, I love you. I know you read every single line. Josh? Thanks for putting up with my coughing, hacking, cranky self. You are the sun in my universe.