Recovery

In case you don’t know me, yes, I have a tendency to over share. Womanly troubles, sex and bodily functions do make their way on my blog from time to time so if that business skeeves you out, well, I don’t know what to say to you.

First things first. About the Sketch Quick! drawings that are pending…

Don’t think I have forgotten about these. When I opened up the submission window it was right before my birthday and the week that will now be known as “the universe hates me” week. Dude, the flu, a migraine and my period ON my birthday! Yes, TMI. What a bunch of bullshit. In any event, once the mucinex family took up residency in my sinus cavities, I broke down and called in for reinforcements. There is only so much bullshit this woman can take yo. The fact my poor husband was dealing with the long lost cousin of The Grinch is an understatement.

Anyway, all things said I am on the road to recovery and can actually see straight now thanks to my friend amoxicillin. I will be getting to the art in the next couple days. Who knows, maybe I will knock em out today. Stay tuned.

Speaking of husband…

Recently he has been complaining of headaches and I have been telling him for a while now that he should just break down and go to the optometrist. Look, he’s 37 and been an IT Nerd since he was 18? All that glare eventually gets you and sure enough, it was time to get him some specs. So he dragged me with him to Target Optical to help him choose some frames.

I know that getting something like this is hard in the beginning… glasses kind of become an extension of you and for a first timer it can be daunting. He’s lucky I got a good eye and wouldn’t steer him the wrong way cause we got them back yesterday and they look HOT on him. HOT. Now, not that he needs the help cause he’s a beautiful man regardless… let’s just say the bone jumping last night was fantastic. Yeah yeah, TMI. Whatever.

Speaking of bone jumping, Reza has become a little more “aware” in regard to that shit. Josh and I are highly affectionate with one another. That is just the way we are and 12 years of being together certainly hasn’t dwindled our sexual chemistry either. Last thing our kid wants to do is even see us hugging… “I KNOW what you’re doing over there!”, she says in this grossed out tone. Well the other day we were getting a little friendly and we looked to the foot of the bed… there she was. Not sure how she snuck past my ears but she did. Thank god we still had our clothes on, last thing I need is my kid getting scarred so young. I still have the visual of when I was a teenager and saw my parents doing “it”.

Oy.

a guest post: holiday hooch

A few years ago, around Christmastime, I walked into one of the local San Diego watering holes, intent on some tap-side deliciousness because Christmas beers are where it’s at, you Philistines, and in that town you have a literal shit ton of badassery to choose from.

There was really no reason to use that phrase, “you Philistines”, but in the spirit of my daughter saying inappropriate and incorrect comments, I’m leaving it there. Like Daughter, Like Father.

Anyway, so we stroll in to this joint (which will remain nameless because they actually sell what you’re about to see and I don’t want to get some lame Cease and Desist order that arises out of one someone googling that shit on the internet.)

Anyway, so we stroll in to this joint and Styles tells me, “Dude. Have you had the Holiday Bourbon?”, and while I’m intrigued, I blew it off ’cause I was on a mission for some St. Bernardus Christmas Ale. He, however, created a monster when he asked me to take a moment, here at the beginning of the evening, and just try a bit. If I don’t like it, I can revert to the classics, but just give it a shot god dammit.

Yeah, I liked it.

I liked it so much, that’s all I drank that night. Literally all night. They had maybe a bottle or so left and I think between the two of us Tom and I polished off most of, if not the rest of that batch. SO SO SO delicious!

Not only was I left with the obvious hangover, but with the burning desire to replicate this greatness on my own. It can’t be that hard, I reason, thinking that if someone else can infuse that shit, why can’t I? But it’s not good enough to create my own concoction. No. One must rip off someone else to justify the total endeavor, thus beginning my hunger and yearning for the recipe for Unnamed Bar’s Holiday Bourbon.

Fast forward to last fall, when The Sheriff came to town for some goodtimes visiting. We got to talking about the Holiday Bourbon, because she not only frequents the establishment which sells the greatness, but she knows the bartenders pretty well. We got to shenaniganizing and determined that if she could get me the recipe, I could probably make this shit with some pretty simple ingredients.

Voila! A conspiracy was born!

True to form, Tania fulfills her end of the bargain and ends up drunk-texting me the recipe – from the bar! – after badgering the shit out of her hookup. Well played, Nefarious Sheriff! Grow a goatee soon so you can be Evil Sheriff!

What you’re about to witness is the contents and production of this text, this holy document, electronically seething with delicious badassery.
______

Ingredients:

1. Bourbon: One 750ml size bottle.

You don’t want to use a Bourbon that’s too expensive because, in reality, you’re corrupting and ruining the original flavor. If it’s a great liquor, don’t jack it up. If it’s a $30 to $40 bottle of Buffalo Trace or Knob Creek or some boutique name of some sort, jack away.

2. Apples. One or Two Large Apples per bottle. (Go with two, just to be safe. I recommend this.)

All ingredients are key, but this one is the lynchpin of the flavor profile. Without the right apples, you’re going to get flavorless gruel. I recommend a VERY sweet apple type, like Honey Crisp or Fuji apples, but I’m sure a nice sweet/tart green apple would be awesome, too, I just haven’t tried it yet. The key is to get an apple that has a very powerful flavor. None of this Red Delicious bullshit, ’cause that’s not going to do you a bit of good.

3. Vanilla Bean Pods. Four full-length pods per bottle.

If you can, buy Organic Madagascar Bourbon Vanilla. Someone explain to me why they’re called Bourbon Vanilla. Is that because it’s meant to go in Bourbon? I THINK SO!

4. Cinnamon Sticks: Four long sticks per bottle. (Note: Start with less and then taste test as you go. Some cinnamon can be stronger and too much will ruin your batch… if you feel it needs more later on, add another stick and so forth)

Again, if the cinnamon sticks are stale, your shit is going to taste shitty. So avoid the old ones in your grandma’s pantry and go to Whole Foods to pick up some good ones. It’s worth it. Listen, the cinnamon can ultimately make the taste go metallic and you don’t want that: if you’re going to try to impress your friends with your Evil Scientist ways, making sure it doesn’t taste like Lead and Sadness is a good way to go.


Ah, how pretty! (Ingredient ratio not to quantity.)

The easiest part of the process is putting all the business together. The worst? THE WAIT. Lamesauce.

However! It’s worth it. So here’s what you do:

1. Get yourself a resealable jar from the Container Store. You’ll also need a vessel in which to put your Deliciousness, so I’d recommend a 750 ml glass flask or some other decanter. Not including the fact that you want all of your ingredients submerged in the Bourbon, you’re going to eventually make more of this shit, so I’d recommend working with a larger size jar.

2. Slice the apples VERY THIN and put them in the jar. Better yet, get yourself a mandolin and just slice the damned things over the jar and directly into the container. You want the juices. Don’t forget to core your apples, kiddies! We don’t want seeds and poison in our hooch, now!

3. Using cooking scissors, cut the ends from your Vanilla Bean pods directly into the jar which is now full of thinly sliced apples. Now, cut the pods themselves lengthwise so they’re split down the center. You can either place them directly into the jar or cut them in half – your call. If you have a smaller jar, cut the pods; you need them to stay submerged in the liquid the entire time.

4. Using brute force and manliness, break the cinnamon sticks in half while growling and/or grunting. This will make you feel awesome while handling such a non-manly ingredient. Place the broken halves into the jar. Continue grunting. Pelvic thrusts are also appropriate.

YOUR JAR SHOULD NOW CONTAIN:

Sliced Apples, Dissected Vanilla Bean Pods, and Manly-Like Snapped Cinnamon Sticks.

Now!

4. Pour the jar of pure, unadulterated Bourbon into the jar, over the ingredients already contained therein. The first time you do this, you may become wistful. The second time you do this, you will rejoice, for you know what’s coming. It’s very much like Buttsex in this way.

5. VIGOROUSLY Shake the Concoction Jar THREE TIMES DAILY for TWO WEEKS. None of this swishing around crap – that helps no one. Grab the jar and shake that bitch like the neighbor’s yappy little dog. Protip: Have the jar waiting for your wife when she opens the shower curtain. 😀


Your pre-straining goo, complete with Straining Tools. The smell is going to kick you in the face.

Typical gestation time is TWO WEEKS, but I’d recommend a tasting after 10 days. For me, cinnamon is a strong flavor and I’m not too keen on a super cinnammony flavor, so I ended up pulling half of mine out around that time. But it’s up to you. If you’re digging the flavor profile, leave it in for another four days and…


Get it now?

Strain that shit into a Flask of Outright Majesty!

Ghetto Setup Straining Tools:

1. Mesh Coffee Strainer.

Yeah, make sure you clean this out nicely. Coffee flavor won’t go with this so well.

2. Funnel.

Funnels are just cool. Getting to use one for legitimate purposes is even cooler.

Regardless of what tools you end up using, just make sure you have a very fine strainer: during the infusion process, you’re going to have a bunch of vanilla flecks from the bean pods and shake from the cinnamon sticks and you don’t want that business in your glass at the end of the evening.

The Carnage and the Glory

You have one other option here, which is to press the liquid out of the Apple Slices and into the flasks/bottles. The first batch did not include this procedure but the second time was Ivonne’s idea. The apples absorb a lot of the bourbon and we can’t waste it now, can’t we? With the compression, you get a bit of sediment that forms in the bottom of your flasks. If you don’t mind that, awesome. I think it adds a bit more flavor, so I just shake the bottle before I serve myself.

As for serving suggestions, it all depends on whether you like your shit cold or not. Personally, this flavor is BADASS when it’s cold outside and the Bourbon is room temp, giving you that extra sensation of Innard Warming. Depending on the apples you use, it can be sweet, so an ice cube wouldn’t be terrible. However! I tried this with two Whiskey Stones the other day and LOVED IT. So yeah, experiment with temperature, but feel free to drink it straight – my preferred method – or get your loved ones loaded by spiking their Hot Apple Cider with a splash of this jimmy, ’cause that’ll fuck ’em right up.

So what’s next?

For this particular concoction, I think a small – SMALL – amount of clove would be pretty cool, so I’m going to try that with my next batch. Cloves are rough, ’cause if you overdo it, the entire batch could be ruined. At an approximate total cost of $60 per batch, that would be very lame.

But what else do you think would work? Maybe some orange rinds to give it a true Hot Spiced Cider flavor? We’ll see!

Finally, as you spend this winter sitting cozily in front of the fire, sipping the Nectar of God’s Own Teat, thank Tania. Without her nagging and badgering, we’d never have this fine moment together.

Happy Holidays!

*******
Note from Ivonne….
When he’s not at work or pretending to not watch me while I am getting dressed, Josh can be found over on his blog www.hotchunkysalsa.com, which really needs to get dusted off.
*hint hint*

Return Of The Mac

“Oh please… after the epic food coma(s) from the past few days the last thing I need to see are blog posts about food..”. Yes, I know you’re thinking it. Such are the days when you’re invited to someone else’s Thanksgiving feast cause they know you have no one in this god forsaken land. I love to cook and as much as I like to host, a feast for 3 just isn’t going to happen, especially when the third party doesn’t want to eat anything I make. With that said, we took up the invite to partake elsewhere.

If there is one thing I do know, is that no matter how small the gesture, you NEVER show up empty handed to a party or gathering. EVER. If you’re one of those people, shame on you. My Mother taught me better, thank you very much.

Now, when it comes to Thanksgiving I like to make non-traditional items. I don’t believe in the whole cranberry sauce, stuffing, candied yams formula of the days of yore. If it’s your thing, more power to you. I like to switch it up, bring in new or revamped dishes… explosions in the mouth if you will.

One can never go wrong with a good mac n’ cheese. Everyone loves it, well except for the lactose intolerant. Sorry! This post is not for you.

The other day my friend Michelle and I were salivating over bacon mac n’ cheese and it was decided that it’s what I would be bringing. Oh, did I say BACON? Fear not oh hippies and non-meat eaters alike, this recipe is for you as well, you can omit the swine if you like. Me? Bring on that delicious salty goodness. So after doing some reading over several recipes, I decided to kinda Dr. up my own version and came up with panko crusted, white truffle, bacon mac n’ cheese. “Did she just say truffle?”… Why yes, I just did.

Panko Crusted White Truffle Bacon Mac n’ Cheese (holler!)

So here is what you will need:

pasta of your choice. I used small elbows
1 tbsp butter (unsalted)
2-3 cloves of garlic
1-2 pints of heavy whipping cream (1 pint per 1/2 lb of pasta)
cheese:
1/2 cup cheddar (grated)
1/2 cup gruyere (grated) 1 cup fontina (grated) (fantastically stanky!)
1 tbsp pecorino-romano (grated or that powdery kind in the photo)
panko bread crumbs (or broken up seasoned croutons if you desire)
2 tbsp white truffle oil (or less, or more depending on how you like it)
salt & cracked pepper to taste

optional: thick cut, applewood smoked bacon

Step One: boil your pasta

Step Two: (if you are making the vegetarian option, skip this part)
While your pasta is cooking, you cook the bacon. I really like that “ends and pieces” package from Trader Joes cause you can pull off all the good stuff and chuck all the fatty whatnot… it has a lot of it too. I keep a tap for flavor but the rest goes. Chop it up and set it aside.

Step Three: The sauce.

Before you start this part make sure you have all your cheese grated and the pasta is ready to go.

This is where the sinful magic happens. Over medium heat, melt the butter and add the garlic cloves that have been freshly pressed. Infuse the butter with the garlic for a little and then add the cream. Add freshly cracked pepper to taste. Constantly stirring! Bring to a boil.

Add the truffle oil. Careful with this part cause depending on the brand of oil you are using, some are stronger than others… The one I used was not as potent in the funk. I also made a double portion so this took 2 tbsp. I would start with a 1/2 tbsp and work your way up till it tastes the range you would like it to.

Step Four: Add the cheese! Make sure you save some of the shreds for the top of the mac.

Step Five: Stir in the pasta. This is where you come into play… balance out the pasta to sauce ratio. If the sauce is too runny, add more cheese… if it is too dry, add a splash of cream or milk. Keep in mind that when this sits in the oven (later) it will probably thicken up.

Salt to taste. Keep in mind if you are adding bacon you may want to hold off a little cause the bacon adds a salty flavor with it. Add bacon, stir and…

Step Six: Transfer to oven safe dish. I made one large portion but you can also make little ramekins to serve as individual sides. Add sprinkles of grated cheese and bacon to the top, then cover with a layer of panko crust.

Step Seven: Broil that shiz! Put it in the oven broiler and do not walk away cause this can go south really fast. Broil till you get a delicious, golden brown crust.

Done! Trust me when I say this is sin in a dish…. rich, decadent and will blow your mind. It was a total hit!

good morning 38

The birthday… where do I start?

Josh, “Saturday you need to be at Green Eggs Cafe at 10:30 a.m…. you have a breakfast date”. Apparently he had been conspiring behind my back… you sneakers!

So Saturday morning I went… I was surprised by Angie, a long time e-friend who I met through my blog, who drove down from North Jersey with her sister Carly, and we had breakfast at Green Eggs Cafe. It was a pleasant surprise and the breakfast was divine. A salted caramel latte with cracked salt on the foam topping is one of the best inventions of the coffee drinking world. I caught myself licking the rim of the cup like I was drinking a margarita. I clearly chose the wrong dish when her creme brulee stuffed french toast arrived to the table. Good lord. There was also a stack of red velvet pancakes at the table which were also NOT MINE. I was blinded by the words “pork belly” and even though my dish was awesome, it wasn’t porn in my mouth like theirs were. Totally merited flock of people outside.

Afterwards I took them to take in a really beautiful Fall day at Laurel Hill Cemetery. I love that place and there is not a visitor that I don’t take there… it’s just worth it. I think they totally agreed it was worth the trek. Shortly after we parted ways and I came home to my family.

It’s always interesting when you meet people you have only known from the e-world. You never know what it is going to be like, will expectations be met? Are you/they the same person there and here? Here is this person who you really don’t “know” but you know a lot about one another from e-interaction. It’s a total trip but always cool when it works out, when they’re nice and it just all falls into place like nothing. Natural and unforced.

That evening, as I was putting away laundry I felt the doom creeping in and lord did it get me. I was up at 4 a.m. with throat of fire. Crap.

Since I was 35, I decided that every morning on my birthday I would take a photo of myself and write about my year. I am not in front of the camera nearly as much and if anything, I like to compare the changes. It was customary to do so on the morning of but yesterday I woke up and felt like hell had frozen over… and parked itself in my skull. Wow. Funny, cause now that I look at my post for 37, I was sick then as well. What gives universe? Why u no let me be healthy on my birthday?

Anyway, I took this photo of myself the day before my birthday. I liked it enough that it ended up plastered on a couple of my social media sites. Excuse the redundancy but if you saw the conditions in which I was in yesterday, you would understand why I would not want to immortalize that day. The flu and a migraine. Ouch. I will eventually take a better, non-cell phone photo and replace it… even if it’s not the day of. I make the rules here, I also break them. I couldn’t have written this post yesterday, there is no way! I couldn’t even see straight.

Josh and Reza were super sweet though, trying their best to make my day good even if it didn’t feel like it. They made me cards, brought me a red velvet cupcake with candles in bed… Josh sent her off to a friends house so she could play. He had made dinner reservations but ultimately I was far too sick to go. It would have been a waste of an amazing dinner so I requested a do-over day once I am back to my usual self.

What did 37 give me? On the outside, a handful of grey hairs and some age spots on my hands… as pale as I am, that business is all but inevitable. Inside? Wow. Where do I even begin? I said I was going to spend last year getting myself together, treating myself better, being a better friend, finding my place in the world and getting the creative juices flowing, surviving Winter. Did I do all of that? Yes and no.

My self is always work in progress. I don’t think anyone is ever 100% the person they want to be… I know I am not. There is always work on the outside and the inside is always changing. I am not the person I was years ago and despite the emotional hardships that I have crossed in the past year, I always search for the lesson to be learned in everything.

So did I get it together the way I thought I would? No. But I had some fleeting pockets where I was very content with a lot of things… riding my bike in the sun with fantastic music in my ears, collecting bugs, sending more mail to my friends than I ever have in my lifetime, watching my daughter grow up into this amazing person… testy and opinionated at times, but spirited and smart as fuck. I like that.

Josh and I hit a rough patch that inevitably took head and while it sucked to have to even say the things that were said, we realized that sometimes you have to fall in order to get back up. We came out of that stronger than ever. Even the best of us have our moments, the difference is I don’t publicize it. Not everything needs to be put out there, especially when it hasn’t been hashed out. Our place in this world is on the cusp of something… we don’t know where the next great adventure is going to be but we know that we are better than where we are now and we are working toward something greater.

The creative factor comes and goes… I hate that it is not something that I have as a constant. It is as temperamental as the tides and just like it rises, it sinks to all time lows. I don’t know why it has always been like that but I do know that it is fueled with lots of self doubts and insecurities. That is something I really need to get away from.

Winter? I’m still here aren’t I? It wasn’t nearly as bad as I made it out in my head and as much as I hate the fucking tundra (as I call it), it’s also nice to be thrown out of my element. Watch us get an epic blizzard next month. HAHHAHAH.

What will 38 hold? A lot more biking when the weather lets me, getting the hell out of New Jersey – wherever that ends up being, more exercise, better eating… being good to my house. Write more letters, make more art, SELL more art for that matter, see new places, have awesome moments to even more awesome music, cherish the ones that matter and let go of the ones that don’t and above all, try my best, be true/honest with myself and everyone else.

Yes! 38, it’s on! Let’s DO THIS.

*******
and in previous years: 37 + 36 + 35

Sketch Quick! Round 4

The window for Sketch Quick! requests is now open!

1. I will accept the first ten requests posted to the comments on beansandink.com only. Not fb or lj.
2. One per person (if I already drew for you lets be cool and let others get a chance, yesh?)
3. No xxx whatnot.

You ask, I draw.

Don’t know what Sketch Quick! is? Please refer to this post

Go!
Requests are now closed

about the cryptic whatnot…

Procrastination
I have so many little things I have been meaning to do and I just cannot seem to find the energy and drive to DO THEM. It’s an interesting place to be. I never realized how climate driven I am until I moved somehwere that actually HAS it. San Diego had climate but nothing like this. Every morning I wake up and check the widget to see what the day is going to be like. Those numbers determine the outlook of my day. I should be seizing the day regardless of the numbers but it is so hard to find motivation when those numbers make your bones hurt, or make you want to seek warmth, comfort and refuge. Even then, I wake up and hope that I get to those things and I just don’t. They say your environment is a reflection of your state of mind. If that is the case, I am totally disheveled.

Anticipation
I guess I can say something now that Josh has. It is no news when I say that we are actively searching to get the hell out of New Jersey. All of this is contingent on employment. One day, on a whim, I looked up a company I know for a fact Josh would LOVE to work for. They had an opening up his alley… and on my encouragement he applied on a long shot. They actually responded. He interviewed… for an hour. Exciting stuff. One catch: It’s in Berlin. Germany not New Jersey ;). It’s one of those things, you don’t want to get your hopes up but you have to discuss it in case the possibility will become a reality. You don’t want to jinx it by talking about it yet it’s so hard to keep to yourself. Kinda like the time I told Josh not to spill my pregnancy news just yet and next thing you know I am getting calls at 12 a.m. from friends at the bar. DOH!

So that is where my head has been at. My stomach has been in knots pending the answer because of what it entails. We have been talking about the possibility of leaving the USA, how it would happen, would it work, looking into visas… you name it. We don’t want to get ahead of ourselves here but the fact is they have not said no. We have to have a mildly formed plan ready in case they they come back and say yes. If the money is enough for us to get by on, we would take it and run. I am sure people are gonna think we are out of our fucking minds for even entertaining the idea, it wouldn’t be the first time that’s for sure. But hey, if adventure knocked on your door, wouldn’t you open it to see what she wants? If and when we know more, we will share it. I just hope it’s good news. Lucky lucky chicken bone.

(And yes, this is what my cryptic facebook post was all about)

Collaboration
Due to the aforementioned, Josh and I have been on a mission: balance and communication. We have to be on the exact same page cause we know there is a lot of change looming. It is really easy to tip the scales… even for people like us who pride ourselves on our communicative efforts.

Extermination
Due to the constant flux of climate + a side dish of stress, I seem to have picked up some of the funky going around. Cold, flu, who the hell knows what this is but I feel like ass. Pair that with the crimson tide and well, you can imagine the hot, emotional mess that I am. I want it gone dammit! Curse you plague! *shakes fist*

Retrospection
Despite everything that is going on, I feel that yet another huge change is coming my way. I turn 38 in three days (yeah dude! I am closer to 40 than you thought) and with it comes the process of looking back. Did I accomplish everything I wanted or hoped for in the past year? No. What will I do to make next year a better one? Where was my mind frame 1, 2, 3 years ago on that day? I think too much sometimes. I really need to stop looking back and focus more on what is ahead.

Misperception
Oh and this is something I need to get off my back… I don’t know where people get off talking about Josh like he is some fucking golden boy who gets shit handed to him like he is King Midas. You don’t know HIM or our family and the implication that he is sitting pretty on a jewel encrusted throne is just presumptuous and ignorant as fuck. He has busted HIS ASS since he was a teenager to have the life he has now, it comes with glorious highs and some serious lows. But you don’t know that cause Josh is the kind of man that *always* focuses on the good. He doesn’t gloat, complain and much less whine. Every single thing he has from his career, our functional and loving marriage, material belongings (that don’t mean shit), his talents, the ability to do many things well… all of that is because that is who he is and if it wasn’t him he worked to get it. WORKED FOR IT… a concept not a lot of people get. I can’t stand people so miserable in themselves that they feel the need to send it the way of others. Jealous twats.

I am normally not the kind to get all aggro and bust out the claws but there are just some things I will defend tooth and nail. Come at my family? Dude, you don’t even know the kind of nasty I will serve.

And that’s all I will say about that. There! I feel a lot better.

nine times two turn one

A year ago today, these little nuggets were born in a crumbling wall in Philadephia. They were found by the people who worked at an Enterprise rent-a-car and had been feeding the stray parents. A few days later the litter six and their mother were swooped up on by a couple named Dan & Rachel who worked with Temple Cats and promptly fostered them. Dan, being a literature buff/teacher/writer named the litter The Joads, after the family in The Grapes Of Wrath.

I came in touch with Temple Cats through Moira, a friend who works at the place we get our hair cut. It just so happened that we wanted a black cat and The Joads had ONE in a whole litter of tabbies and one tux. I saw the photos and I just really wanted her…

At the time we had agreed on only getting one but then one of their fosters posted this photo and all of a sudden two just felt like a better choice.

Because Nena was getting old and we knew her time was limited, we felt it was better to adopt a pair and it just so happened every single kitten was spoken for, except Mr. Tuxedo man which Dan referred to as Skunky. We saw videos of them playing and he just had a great personality so we decided to bring him home as well. We waited for quite a bit for them to be ready to come home and one fine day in January 2012, our family grew by two.

Here are some of my favorite photos of them in the past 9 months…

Gomez is very loving, can’t cover up his shit, a hunter, playful, loves Reza to death, a head butter, snuggle rat, loves to observe the vacuum, his favorite toys are pipe cleaners and definitely the trouble maker. I still find it hard to believe no one wanted him cause I totally believe he was the dark horse of the litter. Such a fantastic personality.

Judas on the other hand is very aloof but when she wants love she demands it from Josh… he is “her person”, without fail always wants love at the crack of dawn when he is getting ready for work, she meows like a little bird, her favorite toys are scrunchy foil balls, is terrified of loud noises… especially the vacuum. Turn that thing on and she bolts for nearest level of the house.

They’re both such awesome kitties and despite the fact they leave hair *everywhere* I cannot imagine not having them around. I am so grateful to their foster families for taking such good care of them, it is a testament to their demeanor… and the fact that they were rescued only makes them that much more special to us. They were meant to be ours.

Happy first birthday Michos!

******
more photos of them over on flickr

search term hilarity

In this edition I bring you another round of the search terms people used that somehow brought them to my blog…

east coast vagina cemetary
diy padded bra
what should i wear in 70 degree weather
cheeks falling out of shorts pics
hippie peanut butter logos
my huge tits get me out of a speeding ticket
pussy hanging out of shorts
jack black butter
girl pulling wire from a bra
dont let the pale skin fool you
Does a banana shake turn into pee or poop
rasta santa
boobs hanging out window
a beautiful drawing picture on the change you want to see in the world
newspaper ink makes me vomit
fucking in the bra factory

Without fail there is always one asking for ass cheeks hanging out of shorts. It’s the #1 leader to my blog and it’s funny cause they click over only to find me and my cat photos. HAHAHAHHAAH.

Jumbalaya

What a crazy past couple of days. I am sure many of you can agree with me when I say I am glad to see this election cycle completed. One can only handle watching people go at each other’s throats for so long. Last night I was a ball of stress and I think it partially contributed to my feeling like I am coming down with something. Boo! I had to go to bed before the results but something woke me up around 1:30 a.m., just in time to catch the victory speech. But to see that a lot of ground breaking decisions that were made last night… wow. Well played M’rrrica.

Speaking of coming down, we are getting a Nor’Easter storm and it is expected to bring some snow today and tomorrow. SNOW! In November! What. The. Hell. I am glad I went to the grocery store so I don’t have to be out in that malarkey. Yes, there will be photos if it’s worth sharing and not some sloppy, slushy mess.

The other day I went to get my old reliable mascara (Clinique naturally glossy in Jet Black) and they had a gift with purchase. I scored up on all these freebies and just your luck, I got duplicates and/or things I cannot use due to color/scent conflicts. My incompatibility is your gain! So if you want any of the below items let me know and I will send it to you. First come first serve and one per person. Comment on my post (not on LJ). Btw, that mascara I always buy is the best, it is the only one I have found that gives a natural, non-tarantulas crawled up on my face look. And no, I am not being paid for this message.

up for grabs:
the make-up bag
Even Better Makeup Broad Spectrum SPF 15 (foundation) color 09 Sand (M-N) too dark for me… you can view the color here
High Lengths Mascara
Travel size of Happy Fragrance.

I keep the rest. I am a product ho.

You know what is sad? When you share news and plans with your friends/family and they can’t even be happy for you or support you despite their own personal opinions. If you come to me and say “Hey! guess what!? I am doing X with X and it’s going to happen on X” the last thing I will do is shit on it. I of all people know that taking risks in order to move forward is one of the ingredients that cake is made of. Sure, I may not agree with things you do at times but the biggest lessons are learned from trial and error. Sometimes trial is rewarding, sometimes you fail and you know what, that is ok too.

This month has been a total joke for school with Reza. The hurricane saw 3 school day closures, there are 3 additional closures and she has like 5 “mini-days” where she goes from 8:30a-10a. Why even leave the curb? Yet we get the “attendance is crucial” letter cause we pulled Reza from school to go to San Diego for 6 days? Oh… ok.

The weather has been making me such a miss pissy pants. Not being able to bike outside has been a total mood killer for me and here comes winter… the last thing you want is a crispy salad or a cool smoothie when your body wants warm and comfort. How do you maintain a healthy diet in the Winter?

And for those of you who are feline owners, I need your help… I have been using Feline Pine with the critters since I have had them. I like the natural whatnot, that part is great but I am seriously sick of all the dusty paws and track they leave everywhere. I have a matt and one of those boxes where they have a little walkway to collect it and it’s not enough. I vacuum daily like a crazy person and I need to find something else for them. So lets talk cat litter, what do you use? And does it reek to holy hell? Help!

On that note I am gonna make myself some tea and get some rest. I feel like butt.

Our triangle at the polls…

When it comes to election day, we make it a point to go together to the polls as a family. It’s important to involve Reza in the process so she has a good understanding of the process and the key role it plays in our lives.

February 5, 2008 – when we chose who we wanted on the ballot for November. Reza had a cold that day, poor baby. Got dayum my man is handsome.

November 4, 2008 – The year Barack Obama was elected. Sadly I didn’t get a shot of all of us but our nugget was there, sporting her best stripy attire.

November 6, 2012 – This morning we bundled up and headed out in 30 degree weather to our local polling place. I forgot my good camera so this cell phone shot will do. This is the first time we have voted out of CA. It was also our first time voting on the electronic machines. And no stickers! Bitches! Luckily there was no one there, so waiting wasn’t an issue. It’s times like this that it’s not a bad deal living in a little township.

The Carley vote has been cast. Now we wait.